


A Piece of Me Died With You

by mendystar1



Category: BBC Sherlock, Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Post The Reichenbach Fall, The Reichenbach Fall
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-16
Updated: 2013-11-16
Packaged: 2018-01-01 18:41:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1047278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mendystar1/pseuds/mendystar1
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John's POV right after the Fall.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Piece of Me Died With You

He didn’t know what he was feeling. He couldn’t even begin to describe it. This grief. This sadness. He couldn’t even if he tried.

This therapist knew nothing. She wanted him to talk. Say how he felt but how could he if he couldn’t put it into words?

It was like falling into a deep hole. One with no light. And all you felt was the fall. Darkness surround you. But you never reach the bottom, because your grief, like this tunnel of darkness, is never ending. Sooner or later, the air surrounding you is moving too fast for you to breathe. Too fast for you to even feel. You’re falling. Farther from anyone you know. Farther from anything you know.

And you’ll never get out.

You don’t want to get out.

What’s the point of living a life when he’s not here? Everyone looking at him like he’s broken. Like he’s crippled. Like he needs sympathy.

No.

He wants to feel needed. Strong. Brave. All those feelings he felt when he was with him. Running around London, loving the chase. The feel of the wind on his face. His heart pumping. His eyes filled with tears from the shortness of breath. His shoulder no longer feeling the ache he felt every time he shifted his body weight.

He knew this was a battlefield. Knew it the first time he walked into a crime scene. Knew there will be enemies, casualties on both sides.

But he never wanted this. He wanted to keep the man who saw him, not as a weak, crippled man that needed pity and sympathy. He wanted to keep that man safe from harm. From danger. No matter how many times he leap into the fire. He wanted to be the one to bring him back out.

But he no longer could.

The fire blazed hot and he wasn’t there to drag him out.

And now he’s gone.

Turned into ash.

into the thing he loved so much.

A corpse.


End file.
